30-Day Blog Challenge (Day 13)

Asking me how I've changed is a big question...there's a lot of factors.  I'm not dating the guy in the above picture anymore. In fact, I'm finally completely over him for the first time in about a year. For a long time I was so hung up on him I could barely function...he not only broke my heart, he broke me. I had a string of one night (or many-night, in two cases) stands that were, if not regrettable, than at least unadvised. Finally, one of them (who is also one of my very, very good friends) gave me some advice that I took to heart and finally started healing. He's the one that told me that AG had broken me, that I'd lost that sparkle, that I'd lost the confidence and the very self-love that had made him have a crush on me way back when he first met me. That I needed to get that back and learn to love myself again
I did. I mean, yes, it took me some time. It didn't happen over night, but it did happen a whole hell of a lot quicker than I thought it would (about three weeks).
And as soon as that happened, I met Ch. (You know the start of that story.)
I was afraid to be happy again. He said he'd wait. We started dating February 26th. Now I'm happy again, and though I can't say it's the happiest I've ever been, it's getting there. And I'm starting to think that's the healthier way to go about things. Him and I have spent every moment since we've met taking out time to build something and I feel more comfortable with him than I ever did with AG.
Well, I mean...there was always this feeling with AG that I wanted to be with him more than he wanted to be with me after a while. With Ch? Never.

Then there's less personal things. I've made a much more firm plan for my future and I'm going to do my best to keep them that way and not let anything or anyone get in my way- especially myself. I'm not willing to give up my life for a guy anymore- the idea of marriage or kids before I achieve the things I'm not going to be able to do pregnant or shackled down.
I care about my boyfriend dearly, but if the time comes? He's going to have to figure out whether I mean enough to him to follow me wherever I go. We'll see.

And I guess that's what's changed.
Manderr